Breakfast in bed as the hotel bring breakfast to your room on account of having no restaurant, whilst listening to Chris Evans’ Breakfast Show on the iPlayer Radio app on my phone. A leisurely start to the day.
Jump aboard the hop on/hop off red bus for a proper hop on/hop off tour (unlike Minsk’s). Another scorching hot day and I’m wearing my Tilley hat for the first time. Yes. I’ve invested in a Tilley hat. I’m of age.
Buy the bus ticket from the same attractive girl I’d spoken to you yesterday – in case I hadn’t mentioned it – Kiev is full of attractive women. It’s on a par with Tokyo in those stakes.
The English commentary is actually with a Scottish accent as we pass the various points of interest.
The Cabinet of Ministers of Ukraine edifice can house 47,000 officials! The Arsenal metro station is 120m deep – the deepest metro in the world and it takes 10mins to descend on an escalator – and I thought 3mins on the St Petersburg metro was a long time (that seems ages ago now!). The large statue I’d seen arriving yesterday morning is, in actual fact, the Mother Homeland Statue and that’s where I’m off to investigate. Walking past all the drinks, nibbles and souvenir stalls you realise how imposing it really is. At over 100m tall it’s bigger than the Statue of Liberty and Christ the Redeemer in Rio. I love these Soviet statues and monuments – they’re solid and muscular. There’s patriotic music playing through the loudspeakers (installed every 20m or so as you walk along the promenade) which gives a sense of occasion. The statue is a woman with arms stretched up with a shield in one hand and a sword in the other.
The Patriotic War museum is housed in the statue’s pedestal and I pay the required fees by tapping each option on the wall for general entrance, photo permit, statue observing platform. The WW2 museum reminds me of my German friend’s mother who lives in Braunschweig, about 2hrs west of Berlin. The mother once told me that her father had said to her and her family during the latter stages of the war that he would shoot them and himself if it looked like the Russians were going to advance further, to save them all from the Russians. She was six at the time. (As an aside to that story she also told me the day the US Army arrived in Braunschweig. They requisitioned their large family home to use as a Headquarters and were told this at 0800hrs one morning and instructed to vacate by 1800hrs that very day. In the rush, she’d left her toy doll behind and so the next day found her way back to the house which by now was cordoned off with rolls of barbed wire – she went to the guard at the front of the family home and somehow made him aware she’d left a doll behind.
He lifted her over the barbed wire so she could fetch it.). I digress.
The museum houses the Victory Medal (the equivalent of our Victoria Cross), given to only 20 soldiers during WW2, consisting of a diamond encrusted platinum medal. It also has a whole room given over to a display of photos of soldiers killed or missing in action with a long table down the middle with glasses, samovars and billet tins. Intrigued, I’m told it’s Russian custom at funerals for people to drink 100ml of vodka in memory of the deceased. Right then, this is the last will and testament of me…..everyone at my funeral has got to drink vodka…that’ll get them giggling in the gangways.
Reach the top of the pedestal and there’s a lift to the viewing platform about 36m up. I see on the ticket check desk that you can go to the very top of the statue upto the shield – in effect the torch of the Statue of Liberty – but as I don’t have a ticket for that I have to walk down all the stairs I’ve just come up to the main ticket office. However, at the main ticket desk they tell me it’s closed today as it’s too hot. Wishing I’d been told that at the top I run (well, drag my feet) back up several flights of stone stairs. By this time an atractive young girl is at the ticket check desk who clearly knows more than the old Soviet trout and confirms that it is indeed closed because it’s too hot.
As it turns out, she’s my escort girl for the lift to the 36m platform and we squeeze in to the tiny stuffy lift. I ask how you get to the shield platform and she shows me a picture of the female statue. And points. saying, “There’s another lift here. You come on her breast. Then you climb up to the platform.” (I just know there’s one colleague who’s only read this article because of its title….eh, BB). The climb upto the platform entailed climbing up a 30m cat ladder inside the arm which would be like an oven in today’s heat and once later on the ground looking up I’m grateful it was closed as I think that would have been too much like hard work in this heat.
Walk through the parks to the Kiev Lavra church complex and see, I am told, the world’s tallest bell tower at over 100m. It’s slightly Chinese pagoda-ish in a Chinese pagoda-ish sort of way. Hop on the bus and finish the tour driving over the world’s first fully welded bridge (not a nut or bolt in sight), passing the Dynamo Kiev football stadium which was used for the Euro 2012 finals and amazed how tight it fits into the surrounding area – could almost be a shopping mall hemmed in like that.
As I’m not risking train food again I search for something to eat for dinner. You can’t go wrong with a flute of French stick, a bit of Brie, a packet of Paprika Pringles and a bottle of red wine – choosing Jinda Lee over the usual Yellow Tail (eh, NT) on account of the screwtop.
Search and find a shop that surprisingly sells all those things.
Am told by attractive young girl (have I mentioned that Kiev has……) on hotel reception that it could take 40mins at rush hour to reach the rail station (despite it taking 10mins coming) so leave at 1700hrs for a 1757hrs train. Arrive station 1710hrs. Find platform easily enough this time and board carriage. It’s the original 1960s Soviet version of the carriage I’ve previously travelled on. As usual, I’m in a two berth but have sole occupancy and enjoy AC, with a lockable door in the corridor wall. 2nd class has 4 berths and an openable window but with a lockable door in the corridor wall. 3rd class has 4 berths in the compartment but no corridor wall and 2 berths in the corridor. It all looks a bit smelly from the outside looking in.
As I’m not playing charades tonight I tap into the phone translate app “Hello, can I buy cold beer on the train?” and show it the provodnitsa on the platform.
She motions that yes I can buy from her. Train departs at 1757hrs on time and at 1800hrs prompt, provodnitsa comes to my cabin and hands a cold can of beer to me….without me even asking. Service with a smile!
We trundle verrrryyyy slooowwwly through the silver birch trees (bored of them yet??…..I am) on a journey to Simferopol that will take over 15hrs – we arrive 0933hrs tomorrow. Fortunately, the trees give way and the landscape opens up into what can best be described as English summer countryside (no, not cold, wet and windy) – I could be on the way home from London.
Typical double parking – it’s everywhere
47,000 people can work in here
Mother Homeland
Big head
Charge!!
Mother Homeland Statue
