Dream that I was on a bus transferring to the Blue Train but rucksack was on another bus going elsewhere. Racing about after it. The sort of dream you actually think is real. Weird.
Wake up and check rucksack is still where it was. It is.
Final train journey of the trip. And may as well go out on a high.
The Blue Train.
Luxury on wheels.
Transfer to Pretoria station at 0700hrs for check in and allocated a suite. Escorted through the station concourse by personal butlers.
Oh yes.
It’s that posh.
Suite even has a bath. On a train. Lounge is in day mode. Two lounge chairs and a table. Convert into beds for night mode. Double glazed big picture window. Incredibly silent in the suite. Train departs on time. Super smooth. Don’t notice it’s moving. Suite is so silent. Carriage suspension is obviously modern as there’s hardly any movement. This is the smoothest, quietest train since the first train I took on the trip in northern Finland. And now this is the last train to take.
Retrieve jacket and shirt from rucksack. Completely crumpled. They’re handed to butler to deal with. “I’ll steam it.” he says. And off he scoots. As do I. For a walk up and down the train. The Club Lounge is at the front of the train. Ask a waiter if I can carry on further than this point.
“If you go further you’ll see things you’ll wish you’d never seen!” and cracks up laughing. Retrace steps. Club Lounge. Suites. Kitchen. Dining car. Bar and lounge car. Suites. Observation car. All very plush with carpets and veneered wood. And quiet. And smooth.
After nearly 10hrs travel across fairly flat featureless landscape arrive Kimberley. Where diamonds were discovered in the 19th century.
And at this point we’ll have a little Victoria Wood sketch: Kimberley……I’m looking for me friend Kimberley. Have you seen her?
Anyway. Moving swiftly on.
As train is 45mins late arriving it’s a whistle stop tour of Kimberley and its famous BIG HOLE. You’re not going to believe this but it really is a big hole. In the ground. The first half of it was excavated by hand. A gantry overhanging the hole allows you to peer in. Gantry moves as people walk along. Which doesn’t feel very safe.
Tour guide is Scottish. Despite living in Kimberley since 1968 he still has a strong Scottish accent. He was a journalist working for the Glasgow Herald. Somehow got a job at a newspaper in Rio de Janeiro. Of all places. Enroute he landed at Kimberley and got a job at the local paper in town.
Met a girl. Married. And never set foot in Brasil.
None of the usual scrum for dinner. A refreshing change. First sitting has been taken in full by the Japanese. If it’s not Canadians. It’s those pesky Japs. At least this allows time to have a bath. On a train. Can’t remember the last time I had a bath. Shower daily just in case you’re wondering. Double the novelty. A bath. And a bath on a train. Except. The bath is not exactly big. Can just about sit in it with my legs straight but that’s it. Have very long legs. To wet my upper body have to lie down with legs up in air running half way up the wall. You all got that mental image now? Well stop it!
My back is now wet. But not my front. Use shoulders to act as a piston effect with the water. Slide down to the plughole end. A volume of water gurgles along my sides such that there’s now more water behind my shoulders than in front.
Clever eh. Did physics and everything at school. With more water behind me I’ll just slide back so it rinses over my shoulders to wet my front. Not just a pretty face you know. Except. At the moment I slide back the train rolls the mass of water up the rear of the bath which is exacerbated by my sliding back. Have my very own Victoria Falls. Water splashing over the sides. Bugger.
Dinner is an elegant affair. Jackets and ties for gentlemen. Evening wear for ladies. If it’s good enough for Prince Edward. It’s good enough for the Blue Train. Two gentlemen of a certain persuasion enjoy each other’s company in the bar car. Both are drinking hideously coloured cocktails. Both are wearing velvet style smoking jackets and bow ties. Look like meerkats off the Comparethemarket.com adverts.
Train trundles through the Karoo desert. No light pollution whatsoever. Inky black sky the like of which I’ve not seen since being in the Chilean Atacama desert.
Stars shine bright like a diamond.
